In previous years, I usually emptied and refilled my bowl of cold cereal about three times before I had eaten enough to feel a clear signal to stop. This morning, I was aware of my fullness signals before I got through one bowl of cereal. I have lived with a long-standing concern about the fact that I ate three bowls of cereal before feeling satisfied. That concern had been magnified by reading cereal box labels, which indicated that I was eating 4-6 servings at a time!

Now, I realize that I ate and ate while waiting for some very strong “feeling” to let me know when I had enough. After eating intuitively for the past two years, I’m much more attuned to my body and I’ve learned that fullness signals can be more subtle. Instead of a “feeling”, I actually experience a “knowing”…an intuition of when I’ve eaten my fill.

This whole “one bowl and I’m finished” situation finally commanded my attention this morning. I realized that I haven’t observed myself in the ritual of 3 refills for a while. For my body, eating 4-6 servings of cereal in the morning may be needed, if for instance I ate a light meal the evening before or walked early in the morning and really revved up my hungry engine. Those scenarios were not usually the case. In fact, most evenings in past years, I ate heavier meals and maybe even “snacked” before bedtime. So, my body probably had no need for that much nourishment in the morning.

My cereal infused reflections led me to think about the accepted breakfast, lunch, and dinner paradigm. Like most people, I was indoctrinated into a schedule of eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner at specific times. And oh, by the way, having a couple of snacks throughout the day is ok too according to that model.

That feeding schedule no longer serves you, when you choose to eat when you’re hungry. You may have multiple meals during any given part of a day. So, I talk in terms of “meals” now: my morning meal (s), my afternoon meals(s), and my evening meals (s).

For my particular body type, dutifully following regimented meal times and non-intuitive advice led me to feel like I “should” eat and reinforced regular overeating. Eating or snacking to “prevent” the possibility of getting hungry later was typical. I keep thinking about a great line that I heard in a movie recently that went something like “how can you know that you’ve had enough of something that you didn’t really want in the first place?”

I have found that it is more difficult to know when I’m full or satisfied if I’m not really hungry when I begin eating. Wait for your hunger signals and honor your fullness signals is SO basic. Why did I have to wait until I was almost 31 years old to read a book that redirected me back to the natural brilliance and intelligence of the body’s weight regulation system?

I now believe that the breakfast, lunch, and dinner scenario worked well when our society was based on hard agricultural labor. We logically took scheduled breaks to replenish our bodies after putting in hours of physical work. How about having an automatic break for a meal following 4-5 hours of sitting on our butts in front of a computer? This situation doesn’t quite compute to me anymore.

We also seem to expect our children’s digestive systems to fall into line and desire food based on a designated time during the school day. While attending school helped shape my mind in affirming ways, that same strict schedule demanded that I eat on cue and helped me develop a habit of ignoring and overriding my body’s natural weight management processes.

I believe that most people simply do not know how to take care of themselves without turning to external substances and situations. Unlike others who settled into habitual smoking, drugging, gambling, shopping or another self-destructive self-soothing habit, food became my caring companion. 

So, a food user typically finds herself eating and eating, unaware of fullness signals, which have atrophied from neglect. What if her awareness and response to her hunger and fullness signals were revived? She finds herself eating 1 bowl of cereal instead of 3.

Many people do not have my life-long challenges related to eating. My brother is one of those people. He is almost 6’ feet tall, eats whatever he wants, and has been slim his entire life. He wakes up most days with a considerable amount of physical energy that compels him to move constantly throughout the day. In contrast, my 5’3 frame needs much less energy and movement during any given day. I can sit comfortably for hours. Not surprisingly, I loved school and was relatively content sitting at my desk during a school day. My brother had more challenges keeping his body stationary and his attention focused in an educational environment.

Because my brother’s body is constantly burning larger amounts of caloric energy, sticking to the cultural norms of breakfast, lunch, and dinner probably works better for him. Unlike me, he has not lived with constant fears about easily gaining weight. Thankfully, as an adult, I have finally restored a natural way of eating that helps my body optimally regulate itself.

What baffles me is that we continue to reinforce one basic eating strategy, even with obvious physical differences in body structures. At the same time, we seem to expect everyone’s body to simply adapt and conform to a certain “acceptable” score board of weight or BMI.

Certain bodies, like mine, attempt to do their very best to adapt to non-intuitive human-created eating rules. However, I have observed that a continuous accumulation of weight points seem to occur due, in part, to that accommodation.

The number of children and adults conditioned to ignore their basic hunger and fullness signals have reached epidemic proportions. We may be finally ready to acknowledge the price of disregarding the body’s wisdom.

What’s the most optimal and sustainable eating strategy for your body?